Penny, Coles AND Clemens for Quinn; A Trade I'd Make by Dr. Christian Troy

First of all, I am already sick of the Chad or Clemens debate and it's not even Draft Day. How 'bout neither? For the Brewster's Millions fans, how 'bout "None of the Above!"? For Brady Quinn, I'd give the dawgs both. Coles is a throw in. *If you don't care for my extended opinion beyond this, read the footnote...and turn the thread.
Chad is Chad folks. Lovers, haters alike. We already know how far that's ever gonna take us. A Doug Brien miss away. Yesterdays tears. From a medical standpoint, it's not even old injuries that have his rarely-brilliant skills on the decline...it's going on age. The kids hitting him are getting bigger and bigger thanks to medical science and fast food. And how smart is it to keep a 6 Million Dollar Man who's on the shelf every other year? (Apparently if you're a FO who took us out of any future FA periods with this year's FA periods, it's hella smart! Tannenbaum must've been taking advice from Isiah.
Coles, you're another Kendall. Only he was a #1 Guard and you're a #2 Wide Receiver. And Mangenius already looks like Man-acne by Week 2 as it is. Plus, WE don't need YOUR headache. I'm 'Noles to the core and I'm sick of you. If I have to decide between you and Baker, I'm taking Baker. His jersey is a bigger hit with the medial marijuana potheads. (Is it too late to get Santana Moss back from the Redskins for this guy? I've seen crazier things. I mean, Isiah is STILL with the Knicks as I type)
I don't know what's up with Coles. Maybe he's been hit too many-...my flip flop is in my mouth. Trade him with Penny and let them ride into the sunset together. Holding hands.
Now, for the final piece of my "Trade of the Decade!" Kellen Clemens.
It might appear to be only a lateral move, shipping Kellen for Brady. But I've already seen Clemens in 8 games, and I honestly wasn't impressed in the least. I like Matt Leinart's potential better already, and HE was replaced by Kurt Warner! Yet, the fact that there is even an argument being made about Chad replacing YOU, is frankly a little scary. But you were just kind of...eh. I wanted to see a caged animal come out, who couldn't wait to get his chance. You looked a little confused, and...god help us, SCARED. Not the kind of feeling I like having about the future of the franchise. Not with yesterday's $pending$. Maybe it's also that INT you threw against NE. It left a bad taste in my mouth, like vomit. Our whole future flashed before my eyes on that play.
Brady Quinn strikes me as a guy who'd freak out in NY. And I think something's wrong in the world when the guy went from a possible #1 Draft Pick to the coverboy for Myoplex without even playing or getting a chance to play. What happened between Notre Dame and the draft that I missed?
I feel like Cleveland has a caged animal. And Anderson's good enough that they don't even need to realize it. It would be worth the risk in my opinion to unload the Good?(Clemens) the Bad (Pennington) and the Ugly (Coles) right now while we're rebuilding...everything. OL. DL. LB. ETC.
*To offset the risk of Brady not being the Tom-kind of Brady, I draft Matt Ryan somehow, someway. Or Flacco if that's all that's "left". Quinn and Ryan, or Quinn and Flacco would be at-least-as-good, or better, than Penny and Clemens. BTW, the cover of Sporting News has "Matt Ryan Has It* as the headline ("Who The Hell is Joe Flacco?" is the sub headline) and before I read the article, if I had to judge a magazine by it's cover I thought the It* was the same stylist as Sugar Ray and Seacrest.
Love The Trade.
Buona Notte, Buona Fortuna

 

I put a * there so those with ADD would feel free to skip ahead to the end.
If you continue driving down a dead end street after you've read a sign that says, "Dead End" you're either a fool or someone with far too much time on their hands. Last night, I was the latter and after reading the SN with Ryan/Flacco it made me sick to my stomach to think about our current depth chart at qb.
Even though this was written tongue-in-cheek, I'd still rather see what Brady Quinn has considering I've already been underwhelmed by Clemens and Pennington. As a Jets fan, you really can't welcome new disappointments fast enough because you know they're coming anyway. This offseason has been the biggest setup to that in the history of Jetsdom. I am one of the few who sees this offseason as a desperate farce and not the way I thought our team would ever re-attempt building for a championship. We are becoming the NY Knicks of the NFL. Pathetic and artificial, not genuine in the least.